Posted By on 9th April 2018

A few weeks ago we took our car for it’s first service. In order to maintain the warranty we had to take it to a Mazda dealership so couldn’t use our normal garage.

When I rang to book it in I was told it would take 2 hours but could I leave it with them all day? Well, no I couldn’t actually as I wouldn’t be able to get home and didn’t fancy sitting in their waiting room for 8 hours.

No offer of assistance in this matter was forthcoming and so the car was booked in for later in the week at 3pm. My normal garage bring me home in the morning and come to collect me at teatime free of charge, so they get to keep the car all day.

I had intended to spend the 2 hours with a puzzle book but on the day in question Peter said he’d come too, so we decided to go window shopping. Before we left we enquired if it would really take 2 hours. Yes, was the reply, 1 hour in the workshop then 1 hour to wash and vacuum it and do the paperwork.

And so we set off to wander aimlessly round the shops returning 90 minutes later in the hope that it might be ready ahead of schedule.

As we arrived we were told they were just ‘doing our paperwork’. To be honest I’m not sure what actual ‘paper’ was involved, because as we know everything is on computer these days, but whatever it was it took them exactly 30 minutes.

It was as if they were determined the job was going to be 2 hours, just like they had said, no doubt to allow some ‘manager’ somewhere to put a positive tick in a box.

I really object to paying through the nose for a garage to clean my car, a job which I’m perfectly capable of doing myself. I’d rather it be quicker and cost less, I also object to being ‘processed’ in the way that we were. What happened to real people and real conversation? I don’t like being spoken to from a script.

But here’s the bit that really takes the biscuit, they sent us a video.

During the ‘summing up’ bit when the chap tried to justify their existence and large bill by taking me through each individual item I did think he said something about a video, but as I didn’t have my reading glasses on, am deaf in one ear and Peter was pacing up and down impatiently in the background, the finer points of what he said eluded me.

By the time we got home the e mail containing ‘the video’ had arrived. Never having had such a thing before and clearly being naive in such matters, I thought it might be a chance to view the service procedure to verify they actually had changed the oil, filters etc. etc.

How wrong I was.

The opening shot was of our car in the workshop bay with the bonnet up, so far so good. Then a disembodied voice introduced himself as ‘Stuart’ and he would be carrying out our service today.

OK. Hello Stuart.

I sat back, but that was it. Finished. The whole video experience lasted all of 10 seconds. No moving parts, no people, moving or otherwise, it was in fact the equivalent of a car ‘selfie’!

Can somebody tell me in what universe that is helpful to anyone? It’s just a waste of everyone’s time and energy. What is the world coming to?

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